Today I had my first weigh in, so though I have been dieting for 5 full days (5 very long days), I have a sort of starting point. I want to cry, but at the same time I know that there is no point, that I just need to get on with it and move on, with this new weight and continue being healthy!

Transparency is a thing…so here’s the worst of it 258lbs. Yes, it went up…but then as someone who has spent the last few months sitting at a desk stuffing her face with biscuits and chocolate and then getting home for a glass of wine and a tub of ice cream.

Yes, I have been that person. I got to the stage where I was all “I don’t care, right now…” depression has hit me full force and I need some motivation!

Last night (Thursday) I had a bit of a failing…a whole tin of evaporated milk. It was delicious, but it was also more calories in a single tin than I had in two meals – so not good.

I was back on track this morning, and though standing on those scales this morning I felt a bit despondent, I know that I now just have to start again, to push myself to the limits and do my best to enjoy all the benefits of eating healthily.

I have done this before, I can do it again…but it’s not going to be easy. If this week has proved anything it’s that frame of mind has a lot to do with the success of sticking to a diet. Bad state of mind…hardship when changing eating habits!

But I have made it five days with a minor slip, and today when I was in the supermarket buying cat litter and bleach (such an exciting life I lead) I managed to walk passed rows and rows of Cadbury’s, new and old flavour combinations on special offer. I then walked passed shelves of beautiful smelling doughnuts and bread rolls.

Carbs are a drug, and I am an addict. Quitting cold turkey is bloody hard.