Day 5 – why is chocolate taunting me?

Chocolate, pasta, doughnuts…all of these things and more have been tempting me this week and do you know what actually tempted me the most? Evaporated milk! Oh well, 5 days in and that’s the only failing I had, so not too bad…

Today I had my first weigh in, so though I have been dieting for 5 full days (5 very long days), I have a sort of starting point. I want to cry, but at the same time I know that there is no point, that I just need to get on with it and move on, with this new weight and continue being healthy!

Transparency is a thing…so here’s the worst of it 258lbs. Yes, it went up…but then as someone who has spent the last few months sitting at a desk stuffing her face with biscuits and chocolate and then getting home for a glass of wine and a tub of ice cream.

Yes, I have been that person. I got to the stage where I was all “I don’t care, right now…” depression has hit me full force and I need some motivation!

Last night (Thursday) I had a bit of a failing…a whole tin of evaporated milk. It was delicious, but it was also more calories in a single tin than I had in two meals – so not good.

I was back on track this morning, and though standing on those scales this morning I felt a bit despondent, I know that I now just have to start again, to push myself to the limits and do my best to enjoy all the benefits of eating healthily.

I have done this before, I can do it again…but it’s not going to be easy. If this week has proved anything it’s that frame of mind has a lot to do with the success of sticking to a diet. Bad state of mind…hardship when changing eating habits!

But I have made it five days with a minor slip, and today when I was in the supermarket buying cat litter and bleach (such an exciting life I lead) I managed to walk passed rows and rows of Cadbury’s, new and old flavour combinations on special offer. I then walked passed shelves of beautiful smelling doughnuts and bread rolls.

Carbs are a drug, and I am an addict. Quitting cold turkey is bloody hard.

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